Most online guides I've found are lengthy, boring, insufficient, or otherwise lacking. Where can I find a guide that explains mod-rewrite extensively, yet concisely?
(The above question sprouts from the following sentiment:) I'm not satisfied with simply copying and pasting the magical incantations that make my .htaccess files do my bidding. I want to learn the dark arts. I want to learn the nooks and crannies of it, so that I can do tricky things specific to my server's needs.
Read the detailed mod_rewrite documentation. It contains everything you need to know. The rest is practice.